We’re having a charity book sale at work, fueled by donations people have brought from home. I’m going to bring in some books tomorrow – I have large number of books I don’t think I’d miss – but I went today to see what my co-workers read when they’re at home.

In addition to a couple of books on photography, I shamelessly bought something called “The Reluctant Suitor”. It claims to be “genteelly steamy”. I am highly amused and cannot wait to throw myself into a world of heaving bosoms and turgid members.

Even though this purchase was made without shame, I *am* somewhat startled to realize that I actually already own a book written by the same author. It was a gift, given after my surgery in ’03 to aid in my recovery. As I recall, it actually made things worse – something about not laughing yourself sick when you’ve got holes in your belly – but it was extremely entertaining at the time. I’m sure this will be no different, as the first line of the book is:

Lady Adriana Sutton whirled through the gracefully arched portico of Randwulf Manor, spilling effervescent laughter over her shoulder as she deftly avoided the reaching hand of an eager young swain.

Yeah, this is going to be awesome.

My Hello Kitty calendar tells me today is Ash Wednesday, and the first day of Lent. I am not religious, but I am intrigued that people give up things in an effort to appease their god for transgressions committed in the previous year.

The traditional definition of Lent and repentance, according to the internet, is an admission of guilt, promises not to do it again, and restitution for whatever sins were committed. I can understand the whole “oh man I did something really bad and I swear I will never ever do it again and I will totally pay for the damages I caused when I got it into my head that naked bull riding was totally acceptable in the coffee shop down the street” angle, but I am confused as to where the “I will give up chocolate for 40 days” comes into it. Are you going without something you enjoy to prove you love god? Is it a guilt thing – you’re punishing yourself to make up for your life of filthy degrading sin? Help a heathen out – what’s the deal with Lent?

I know I am not “required” to observe Lent given that I am a godless barbarian, but my Lentils (that’s what you call the things you give up for Lent, right?) are coincidentally the very same things I pledged to change for a healthier lifestyle and also some free stuff:

1. Quit smoking
2. Quit drinking
3. Cut back on bacon milkshakes

.. I am so going to rock at Lent. Lenting is fun!

I smell phantom soup. My Canadian Heritage Moment has progressed from breakfast to lunch.