Monthly Archives: June 2009

putting on my ranty pants

Posted in everyday kimli, fuuuuuuuu, medical anomaly by

What is it, exactly, about my lack of desire to force human beings out through my vagina that makes me less worthy of receiving medical care than the next woman?

I am looking for a family doctor. The clinic is finally catching on to my game of “only coming by when I need prescriptions”, and as I clearly look like some sort of drug-abusing psychopath with a lot of free time on my hands, they’re doling out my anti-crazy pills in one-month prescriptions. This is a huge pain in the ass; one that can supposedly be resolved by getting myself a family doctor who can monitor my extensive drug use (and probably keep me from experimenting with my dosage which is apparently frowned upon for some fascist reason).

You may not know this because I am very keen on privacy and anonymity, but I am female. As such, I would prefer a female doctor – not because I think men don’t know anything about vaginas, but because the male doctors I’ve had in the past are less inclined to take my word for it that my girl parts need inspection immediately so please break out the damn speculum already and I will drop trou. They usually send me off to get blood tests and x-rays and ultrasounds and psychological examinations before giving me an internal exam, which just seems like they’re wasting time and avoiding the issue at hand (ie: my vagina). The female doctors I’ve had are less squeamish about slipping on the latex and getting to know my uterus on a first-name basis. I don’t LIKE going to the doctor – trust me, if I’m in there and saying “I think I broke my vagina”, you better believe there’s something wrong down there.

So, I’ve been shopping around for a new physician. I looked online and found a BC site that will give you a list of doctors accepting patients based on your location. Sweet! I picked a name at random, and started calling.

Every single female doctor’s office I called is accepting new patients .. if you’re full of baby, trying to make baby, thinking about having baby, have already had baby, or ARE baby.

Fuck you guys.

Do you get kickbacks from diaper companies for every squalling infant you bring into the world? Are you in some sort of competition? Do you run on energy absorbed from the glow of pregnant women? Are you a maiesiophiliac? Why are breeders any more deserving of quality health care than those who do not want children?

FUCK you guys.

I’m so pissed off about this. I really want to know why preference is given to breeders, to the point where it is impossible for those who have made the choice not to reproduce are having trouble finding a physician. I know I’m not the first person who’s run into this problem, which is just disgusting.

I have an appointment this afternoon to meet a potential new doctor. It’s a male doctor. I’m not thrilled about this, and if I’m still feeling pissy this afternoon, I may just confront the office and find out why the esteemed Dr. Heather wouldn’t see me unless I said I was thinking about signing up for 18 years of servitude. I loathe discrimination in any form, and I’m definitely feeling it here.

Angry Kimli is a force to be reckoned with (in my own head).

represent

represent

time to upgrade?

Posted in adventure, everyday kimli by

I want a Jeep.

I don’t particularly know WHY I want a Jeep; I just know that when I see them I go “ooh!” and there is coveting and daydreaming about going off on Jeepy adventures with the top off and various breezes blowing through my lady parts. Ed does not seem adverse to the idea, which is doing little to quell my urges. We could totally get a Jeep. It would be awesome.

With the exception of my Metro, I’ve never had a truly manly car. The Mazdabator is great, but it doesn’t really strike me as rugged and tough – if it was a person, it would get manicures and moisturize with expensive potions. Jeeps don’t get manicures; they’d say “it’s just a flesh wound” and continue swashbuckling their way through the swarthy jungle. I want in on this action. It is precisely the kind of adventure I want to have, swords and all. You can’t swashbuckle in a Mazda 3! Bring on a Jeep!

A Jeep would come with a free membership to the Cult of 4×4. I’ve lost most of my weekend friends to the Cult (of 4×4, not the Cult that sells sanctuary), but I’m not particularly interested in joining them. I figure there’s a lot you can do with a Jeep that doesn’t involve mud – in fact, I sort of see a Jeep as a dandy compromise between a useful vehicle and a fun convertible. As much as I’d love to have some sort of zippy little convertible sports car, it wouldn’t really be all that useful for day-to-day, non-adventure things. I refuse to be a two-car family again, as we don’t use the one car we DO have – so really, the only option is to get a Jeep.

A dark green one, with a soft top and roll bars and removable doors and maybe a little trailer hitch for the scooters.

There are valid arguments against the Jeep Lobby, though. For one, we’d have to sell the Mazdabator and I *love* the Mazdabator. We just paid it off, and I really like the extra $400+ a month we’re no longer making in car payments – that’s a lot of ale and whores. I’d probably fall out of a Jeep and break myself. I’d need to buy a ladder to get into it.

But still. Jeepy adventures! That’s awfully enticing.

Last night we went BALLS OUT for Ed’s birthday dinner, dining en masse at Joe Forte’s. I had the Surf n’ Turf (with extra surf), and it was soooooo good – probably one of the best meals I’ve ever had. It was a spendy evening out, but it was a birthday dinner and Ed enjoyed it and that’s all that matters. Plus, I had scallops and they were enormous and delicious. Hooray!

Should we get a Jeep?