Deep down, I knew this would happen – in my absence, every single one of my clients went brain dead and are now floundering helpless in the ditches waiting for someone – i.e. ME – to spoon-feed applesauce to them. Would someone like to dislocate my other shoulder? I do not want to be here.

Speaking of shoulders, mine is slowly getting better no matter what Ed says. I think he would like me to be invalid forever. Every time I try to tell him that my shoulder herpes is feeling better and that I have more mobility in my arm than I did a couple days ago, he flat out tells me “no it doesn’t, and no you don’t”. Well gee, I thought I would be the one to determine my all-betterness, but apparently not because Argumentative Ed is in the house and boy let me tell you, Argumentative Ed is my favourite Ed of all. I’m healing, though. I still have scary moments where it feels like my shoulder is half an inch away from pulling out of the socket and these weird clicks keep going off in my arm, but I’m not lying on my deathbed with my other arm across my brow any longer. I might even be able to do my own bra up the normal way one day soon! It’s good to have goals.

I’m a little worried about getting back in the proverbial saddle, though. Scooting over the Lions Gate Bridge has been unnerving me for some time now, and after my accident, the thought really fills me with a bit of dread. I don’t want to be afraid of riding my scooter, so I have to just suck it up and get going. It’s still going to be a week or so off – my arm isn’t scooter-riding-better yet, and my insurance ran out two days after the accident. I’ll use the time to remind myself how glorious it is to ride and not fall down, and I’ll be coasting over the bridge at dangerous speeds again before I know it.

Urk – our fancy outside office lunch is not sitting well in my bellies.