Most people, when nervous, tend to sweat or stutter or twitch.

When I’m nervous, my eyes start to water.

A lot.

Not a big deal, right?

Except I really like my mascara.

A lot.

No, it’s not waterproof. Yes, I spent most of my thing with big black streaks around my eyes. Yes, I am sure it made a fantastic impression.

The thing went well. Now I get to stop being nervous about the thing and instead hunker down to be nervous wondering if they liked me and if they want me for stuff. I am sure the runny mascara absolutely helped my cause; nothing says “I am a loyal and hardworking employee” like looking as though you’re about to burst into tears.

Just call me Streaky McGee!

Crap.