I am really fucking angry with myself.

I had another accident last night. Like my last 17 incidents, it was a stupid freak mishap that resulted in a bloody knee, many more bruises, and worst of all – Oscar’s first dings. I haven’t even had him for a week and he’s already quite obviously MY scooter because he’s banged up in several places. It’s just some scrapes – nothing serious or really all that noticeable unless you’re close up – but I am mad at myself, at the hill I fell on, at Ed, at Oscar, at my bloody bruised knees, and anything else within my sight.

I know it was just a stupid accident and it could have happened to anyone, but it happened to me, again. Halfway up a steep hill I decided to turn around, forgetting that Oscar is at least twice as heavy as Sally, and also taller – and because the hill was really that steep, I misjudged my footing and toppled onto my left, sliding down the hill a little. I scraped up Oscar’s left side, putting gouges into the knee panel, the front fender, and the Vino badge. It’s nothing a little touch-up paint and a new badge won’t fix, and my bruises will eventually go away and my knee will scab up and I’ll look extremely sexy in short skirts – but I am so fucking mad at myself I could scream.

I’m always careful. I don’t ride like a maniac, I don’t take risks, I don’t do outlandish things or try to show off. So why do I keep falling over? Is every freak accident I have just that – a weird mishap that results in down? Why does it keep happening to me? Ed argued that every single one of my accidents were avoidable, to which I scoffed – technically, every accident is avoidable. However, I wasn’t DOING ANYTHING to cause accidents; they just happened – which I suppose is the very definition of “accident”. So, what gives? Am I really that much of a klutz? Is the universe conspiring against me? Are my 84 small accidents saving me from one big accident? Is there any way I can completely avoid wet leaves, slippery concrete, curbs, and hills? Should I just buy a suit made of bubble wrap and call it a day? Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. I am just so mad at me. I fucking suck.

Poor Oscar. Welcome to life with Kimli!

Fuck.