delicious juice dot com: unapologetically inappropriate

Few things fuel me into a rage of activity like having my job summed up as “making things pretty”.

By now it’s not much of a secret that I’m a technical writer – I make documents. Sometimes, I will take other people’s documents and clean them up so they’re a) accurate, b) easy to follow, and c) formatically perfect. Yes, I suppose this could all be dumbed up as “making things pretty”, but I do so much more than that – for example, I’m also a process mastermind. The reason I sit in on these boring-ass meetings isn’t because I’m here to take notes, I’m here to point out the ways in which you’ve fucked up and suggest an alternate process that makes life easier for a dozen people in the long run. And yes, I will document the processes I create when I’m done. I’ll even put some flowers in the margins, if you want it prettied up that badly. But when we’re in a meeting and you announce that Joe will do X and Ann with do Y and Fred will do Q and then “Kimli will just make it pretty”, you are an ass.

Also, I outrank you. So please fuck off, and thank you.