My friends, I’ve been handed a challenge.

I need to get a document to my mother for her signature, and have it send back to me.

This is the year 2009. I should be able to email it to her, have her print it out, sign it, then scan it into a PDF and email it back to me, right?

As if it’s going to be that easy!

My mother doesn’t have a computer. I am not exaggerating when I say that I do not think she has ever touched a computer in her entire life. What would be a quick 10-minute task for most people has suddenly turned into a conundrum: how did we get documents back and forth before the internet?

I could fax it, I suppose – but to where would I fax it? My mom works in a bakery; one that does not fax cookies and cakes to hungry people. They don’t do catering or large orders, and I don’t think they have a fax machine. My mom’s lawyer retired – can’t send it there. She doesn’t go to any libraries or coffee shops or any place I can think of that might be useful for this. Short of mailing the thing to her, I don’t know how I can make this happen.

Maybe I could try forgery?

Nah, I’ll just mail it. This is a pain in the ass. I should be allowed to sign something on her behalf – after all, I have POWER OF ATTORNEY. Surely I can use it for something like this – or is it one of those things that sound totally awesome but are really kind of useless, like winning the lima bean lottery or a doctorate in ancient Klingon? Too bad. It sounds really cool, but what good is it when it comes to minor annoyances?