delicious juice dot prize

They’re either filming something downtown, or we’ve been invaded by the US – there are stars and stripes all over the place and it’s a little disconcerting. I don’t mind a Yank or two – heh heh – but an entire invasion’s worth would be just too many soaring eagles and “Never Forget” mudflaps for my liking.

I promised the story behind my chemical burned nipple, so here it is. It’s actually not really THAT interesting, but as I couldn’t sleep that night because it hurt all over, I had to laugh at yet another one of those things that make the whole “Perilous Kimli” thing a little to factual to be just a cute nickname.

I did, in fact, get hair removal cream all over my left nipple. I was taking a bath and was kind of bored and hairy, so I decided to would put my bath time to good use by a) giving myself a facial, and b) using the rest of the Nair to de-hair my legs. It took some fancy maneuvering to get the lotion all over my legs while moving as little as possible and keeping my limbs out of the water, and for some reason I thought that if I were to lie on my back and stick my legs up in the air above me, I would be able to keep the cream from washing off while my face mask dried and the rest of me soaked.

Needless to say, it was a lot more complicated than I thought it was going to be. A big glob of cream dripped off my leg and onto my boob, and I .. didn’t notice. It wasn’t until I was done scraping the hair off my leg and rinsing out my muck-clogged pores (sexy takes work, you know) that I noticed an uncomfortable burning sensation on my boob. I looked down, yelped, and rinsed the goo away – but it was too late. The cream had burned nasty red marks and spots into my admittedly already-scarred nipple, and it HURT. It’s better now, but still not entirely pain-free. I wasn’t TRYING to remove anything from my nipples; I do not have hair there – I am just clumsy and kind of oblivious to my surroundings about 80% of the time.

I promised a fabulous prize, and I will gladly deliver. In fact, it’s sitting beside me ready to send out. But oh! What to do! Ali is well-versed in my accident-prone ways, and quickly guessed the right answer. However, I already have a fabulous present for her that is completely independent of the Delicious Juice Dot Contest. It hardly seems fair (although she probably thinks otherwise) to give her TWO fabulous presents, so I am instead going to offer up the prize to LOLA, who posted the silliest – yet absolutely plausible, given my track record – guess of the lot. Yay! Lola, email me (kimli at this domain dot com) your address (I swear I am not a creepy stalker) and I will send you a fabulous prize!

I have more to say but I am swamped in other people’s laptops that are drenched with viruses and other nasty horrible things.

4 thoughts on “delicious juice dot prize

  1. CHEATS! HACKS! Okay, I admit it’s kind of like being an employee and being excluded from entering whatever contest your employer is running, but still!!! It’s not my fault that I am awesome and have a series of webcams installed in your place so I know all that you do. Erh… Uhm… Happy December!

  2. Pingback: perilous kimli redux « delicious juice dot com

  3. Pingback: vacation postin’ day 2 « delicious juice dot com: unapologetically inappropriate

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