I’d been awake for the better part of an hour listening to the rumble outside, thinking that a) it was awfully early in the year for the gang fights to be starting already; and b) it was a good thing I hadn’t deleted the Sharks! Jets! category like I was thinking about doing because of the lack of choreographed dance-offs happening lately. Since I knew there were things going on and drunk people everywhere, I didn’t think much of anything when our intercom buzzer went off:

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzz

Oh, shit. Go away, drunkos, I’m not letting you in.

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzz

I really hope they’re not leaning on all the buzzers waiting for someone to open the door. Maybe I should get up and go lean out the window and tell them to fuck off.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

What the fuck?

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

*pad pad pad* Who is it?

THIS IS THE POLICE

Um, WHAT?

All the craziness I had been listening to was apparently someone’s bike being stolen and said stealee being assaulted in the head. While all this was going on, someone saw it fit to a) take a shell (?! who goes on a rampage with a SHELL?) and smash the fuck out of the front door of our building, and b) take a large boot to the rear passenger door of the Mazdabator. The police were looking for Ed, to tell him that his car had been pounded upon during the altercations out front. Well, shit. Ain’t THAT a nice way to wake up on a Friday morning! Goooooood morning North Vancouver!

Strangely enough, all the ruckus outside started the same time I heard the idiots upstairs yell their way home and loudly stumble up and down and across the stairs and floor above ..