I am thinking about going back on my brain medication.

I do not want to do this. However, since coming off, I’ve noticed the following:

• I just can’t live without rageahol – I am angry damn near all the time. I am angry at people and places and things. I find myself wishing someone would throw a punch at me just so I have an excuse to go all postal. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a punch, either – go on, cut me off on my scooter or change lanes into me. I WILL WISH THAT I COULD FUCK YOU UP
• My casual swearing has increased by 400%, and has gone up in volume – I am no longer discrete about describing run of the mill things peppered with things like “holy mother of fuck”, “this is the best shit fucking son of a cunt sandwich I’ve ever had”, and “hey, your mom’s a whore – did I mention I saw an eagle yesterday?”
• Things that may have mildly annoyed me while medicated are infuriating now
• I am much more dissatisfied with my life than before, possibly because of my ongoing fury
• I have much more disgust for the things, people, ideas, lifestyles, I find distasteful, rude or stupid. Normally this would be a non-issue, except see bullet points 2 and 3.
• Normal people would be disappointed that they can’t get a dog. I am blindingly, wildly, viciously, fumingly, violently mad about it. Do you want to fight? I will fight you over it. I am small but insane, and my tiny mutant elf hands could do a lot of damage.
• Angry. Angry. Angry. Did I mention that I’m angry? Maybe it’s just left over from last night’s festivities, but I am angry.

So, yeah. Maybe I’m not crazy after all, I’m just plain mad to an unhealthy degree. Good thing you’d never know it to look at me.

Cheery stupid happy updates will return soon, I promise.