The effects of the Purple Monkey Dishwashergate Scandal are fast and far-reaching – I’ve spent the morning moving my desk in The Lab down the hall, away from those I gone did done wrong somehow. I was always going to be moving, as my old desk belonged to someone out having babies and was due to return shortly; the scandal just moved things up a few weeks. My new spot is much better, actually. I have a whole row to myself, a window seat, and a ledge for my many, many toys. It is good.

That doesn’t mean it still didn’t sting to learn that people were in an uproar over something I allegedly did, though.