naughty oughties

To heck with the end of the year; it’s the end of a DECADE! Let’s recap this bitch:

2000: I wasn’t blogging at this point, so I honestly have no idea what I did. If memory serves me correctly, I was working for P&G and moved out of my bachelor suite into an apartment with Ed so that was pretty major.

2001: Was downsized. Started blogging. Played many games with the QGirlZ. Got a new job; met many people who would become important fixtures in my life. Got engaged!

2002: Had many excellent times with Ali.  Got downsized again. Started shoutcasting. Got married!

2003: Couldn’t find a job. Started wearing corsets for fun and profit. Casted games almost every single day. Finally found a job; drove me to a deep depression. Had a heartbreaking fallout with friends. Things were terrible.

2004: Went on medication to fix my brain. Got fired from my horrible job. Started working for IBM! Finally moved to Vancouver hooray!

2005: Enjoyed Vancouver. Got a scooter! Began Operation: Convince Friends to Move. Casted a lot; traveled. Lost my father under suspicious circumstances; was devastated.

2006: Casted at CES; was told you can’t market Mama Cass. Ego STILL reeling almost 4 years later. Downsized again. Got a job at a Space Station. Continued to scoot. Had to wear pants for 2 months as Josh crashed with us before finding an apartment.

2007: Casted at CES again; fatness be damned. Shan moved to Vancouver! Dislocated my shoulder fighting ninjas. Things in Space went from bad to hilarious. Sold Sally to Reilly; bought Oscar. Lost my job in an extremely illegal manner; was paid hush money to never speak of it again.

2008: Got my current job. Visited a potato farm deep undercover. Scooted everywhere! Had excellent times with our motley crew of assorted friends. Started to go insane again; upped my meds in response. Bought all the video games in the world.

2009: .. read yesterday’s post; I’m not typing that shit out again.

Reading my old posts is kind of like torture. I’m glad they’re there, but strictly for informative purposes – when I am captured by enemy agents and they shine lights on me and ask where I was on August 18th 2003, I can answer with some degree of certainty. No, I wasn’t infiltrating that fancy dinner party with the heads of state; I was shopping in Calgary. Why do you ask?

So, what did I hope to accomplish in 2009? According to the internet:

  • The usual; eat healthy and get outside more
  • Drive to San Francisco – I have Ed’s word that this will happen this year
  • Continue to eliminate our debt – the Mazdabator will be paid off in March, which will go a long way in helping us get rid of the other debts
  • Here’s a new one: buy fewer video games. Shock and awe and all that, but I actually burned myself out on DS games this year. I currently have 5 unopened titles that I need to find time to play, and I’m just not feeling the burn like I did earlier in 2008
  • Really work on that Being Social thing – Vancouver has a large and active blog community but very few people know who I am, even after being a Best of 604’er
  • My no-flying in 2008 went really well; let’s continue to be green and attempt to scoot everywhere instead of driving (except to SF)
  • Upgrade Oscar to 150ccs so I can go zippy fast hooray!
  • Keep living the excellent life
  • Be happy and content with Ed and our feline army
  • Get my wordy tattoo
  • Take over the world

Not too shabby. We did make great progress with our debt, but then we went and bought a condo so looking back on the 2K we owed back then is hilarious and quaint. I did fly in 2009, to Edmonton and back so there goes that one. I didn’t get inked – I still want to; I just ran out of time. World domination? Well, that takes time – ask me again in a couple of years, but I’m guessing by that time you’ll all be pledging allegiance to the Great Nation of Delicious Juice. The uniforms are orange. You’ll love it.

What will 2010 bring? I’m not allowed to tell you – something about causing a paradox – but here’s what I’d like to do:

  • Use the fancy new gym downstairs
  • Graduate kollege
  • Scoot to Seattle
  • Spend more time in Portland
  • More scandals!
  • Go swimming
  • Survive the Olympics
  • Do more crafty things
  • Have all the fun ever

.. it’s a good list, I think.

How about you?

4 thoughts on “naughty oughties

  1. Pingback: backfired | delicious juice dot com: unapologetically inappropriate

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