People today are inordinately concerned with my ability to transport myself and my various things to and fro on Lola. You can tell that these people a) do not ride things with two wheels and b) do not have any sort of imagination, because it’s incredibly easy to carry a wide variety of things on a scooter. Both windows in the drive thru this morning expressed outlandish, repeated concern about how I was going to carry my muffin and drink – it’s not hard, people. I do it several times a week. See, there’s this thing – I call it a “bag” – and a hook, and I have this all planned out, and just give me my damn Diet Coke already.

All it takes is a little imagination and some basic Tetris skills and you can carry pretty much anything: a huge lamp, untold amounts of groceries, flattened moving boxes (I don’t really recommend this one, but it’s doable), a garbage bag filled with cilantro and Swiss chard, an entire set of golf clubs like the guy on the BWS this morning. Carrying a drink is not a challenge. Carrying three 2L bottles and two 12-packs of Diet Coke? THAT is a challenge (one that I passed, thank you very much).

I think I like it better when the drive thru ladies scold me for not coming by often enough, because at least they’re happy to see me and not FULL OF DOUBT about my awesomeness.

I have a dentist appointment at noon today to deal with my tooth, and I can’t wait. I would have made the appointment sooner, but I actually lost the tooth a second time and had to turn my house upside down to find it (it was in a pocket). I emailed the dentist office and asked them what I should do about the gaping hole in my gums, to which they responded “um, you should probably come in” with the implication that I was dumb for emailing instead of calling (I hate the phone, ok). I didn’t really care too much about the missing tooth (except for my initial terror that I was 23 short steps away from being a scary toothless old woman offering gummers for $5) as it didn’t hurt – but it’s really starting to bug me now because I can’t stop poking at it with my tongue. I can feel the posty things up there, and they’re sharp and sticking out of weird places. I don’t know what the dentist is planning on doing, but I don’t think I’m going to like the outcome – for starters, I don’t know that I want the tooth to be put back. It’s kind of extremely disgusting, and it might wig me out to know that it’s in my mouth. Seriously, it’s gross. I’d show you, but it’s horrible and embarrassing. I would rather believe that everything inside of me is awesome, even the things I can’t see.

Ohh, I need a haircut.

Here is my cat cuddling with a spoon.

cheddar wishes she could quit spoon