Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve found the Saddest Place on the Internet. No need to thank me!

Everyone knows that commenters on YouTube are terrifying due to their flagrant stupidity and sheer volume of responses. The same goes for those who comment on news stories, where you’ll find the very bottom of the primordial ooze barrel; the sort of people our extraterrestrial forebeings hoped we would have weeded out of the evolutionary chain long before this point. If it’s even slightly controversial or common sense, you can be assured there’s an entire Bible-based organization out there foaming at the mouth trying to stop everyone from moving forward as a species, all in the name of specific parts of an old book they choose to highlight as “proof” their bigotry is justified.

And then there’s the people who comment on comic strips.

In addition to the web comics I read daily, I also follow a few traditional comic strips on GoComics.com. With one exception, there are dozens of comments below each strip made by people responding to what the characters are saying in each panel. It’s .. weird. I don’t know why it bothers me so much that there are adults out there who start each day by giving advice to the mother from For Better or Worse on how to raise her kids, but it does. It’s creepy. They call back older conversations between characters, suggest things they should do or say, give relationship advice, analyze every little thing. In one strip I read, the commenters are freaking out because the main character made a “Godfather” reference – but she’s only 9, so SHE SHOULDN’T HAVE SEEN THE MOVIE! SHAME ON HER PARENTS! Seriously, what. I know that, in the grand scheme of all the things wrong with the internet, this is incredibly trivial – but I find it incredibly unsettling to see people with such stake in what these fictional people do. It ain’t right. Internet, stop being creepy. Thx!

I have a headache that is entirely too big for me to deal with.