Category Archives: vroom vroom

scooter gang takin’ over

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Yesterday was the first official ride of the Scooter Shooters (name may not stick) – six nerds on scooters, with (many) cameras (disclaimer: Shan isn’t that much of a nerd, and Ed didn’t have a camera).

On three rented scooters and three personal scooters, Miranda Reilly Shan Josh Ed and I rode all over the city. We went through Stanley Park a couple times, participated in the Stanley Park Water Fight, ate enormous burgers at Vera’s, through Kitsalano, past Jericho Beach and Spanish Banks, neared Wreck Beach, through the UBC campus, and back again. It was awesome.

I rigged a flexible tripod to Oscar’s handlebars, and was able to take pictures duding the ride as well as some videos. Check out my Flickr page, and go here for the videos. They’re shaky – even Image Stabilization won’t keep a steady picture at 60km/h – but they’re pretty fun.

I’m tired, but satisfied after having such a great Saturday. Today, we clean. Somehow it’s just not as exciting.

home is awesome

Posted in everyday kimli, i'm an astronaut, international kimli, medical anomaly, vroom vroom by

Home! Man, I like home.

Edmonton was great. The weather was perfect – not too hot at all – and we got to spend some quality time with the in-laws and also cousins. Some obligatory shopping was done (love that no PST), many donairs were eaten (okay only two, but they were enormous and oh so tasty), and good times were had all ‘round. The visit seemed incredibly short, but we got a lot done.

The ride back was nice, too. The weather was overcast for the first 7 hours of the 13 hour drive, so it wasn’t too taxing on the head and the scenery was gorgeous as usual. The cats were ecstatic to see us, which is always nice – nothing like a little adoration to perk the spirits right up again. A quick shower had us feeling human again, and now we’re back to status quo albeit with a jam packed July to look forward to.

I fucking hate mosquitoes, though. One bit me on the face in Edmonton, and we were pretty much attacked by them in Blue River when we stopped to get gas. Fucking beasts – I bet I have 19 West Nile viruses now.

I brought my wedding dress back from Edmonton. I don’t really know what I’m going to do with it; it’s not some sort of incredible heirloom I need to pass down to my non-existent spawn. I suppose I could sell it, but it wasn’t expensive to begin with – I opted for a bridesmaid dress that was around $200 instead of the traditional crazy expensive fanciness. I don’t want to preserve it – that is lame – but I don’t envision wearing it again, so .. what to do. Donate it? Set it on fire? Frankly, I’m leaning towards the fire – given all the horrible, horrible stress I had over the fucking thing, I’m content that it served its purpose and now it can go away. I wonder if it could be tie-dyed? Heh.

Ed has the day off and I’m working from home. He’s actually on his way to Scooter right now, using his birthday money from his parents to put a deposit down on his Dio – it needs to be imported and upgraded out the wazoo, so he’s giving Wayne the go-ahead to get the process started. SCOOTERS! SCOOTERS FOR EVERYONE! I can’t wait – having people to ride with is so much fun, and Ed’s wanted a scooter pretty much since I got Sally. FUN! Hopefully he’ll get it in time to enjoy a few months of summer riding before we have to store them for the winter, but WHEE!

In Edmonton, we rode a quad. Ed’s dad has an 800cc Polaris something or other, so we took turns riding up the back alley with it. The thing is fucking TERRIFYING – I went (very slowly) up the alley and then turned around (in an utterly graceful 25-point turn) and came right back. It’s about 675 too many ccs for me; I can’t imagine every riding something that powerful on a regular basis. It made me want to come home and hug Oscar in all of his 125cc glory – there is NO WAY I’m ever getting anything bigger. Ed liked it, but there was just way too much power under me for any sort of comfort level. Scary. Kimli no like.

It feels like I’ve been gone from work for weeks, but I only took last Friday off. I suppose it’s good that no one missed me – next week I’ll be gone for 4 days to help my mom and I’ll feel guilty every time I think about work even though I know I shouldn’t. It’s tough having a superiority complex – people aren’t supposed to be able to deal with my not being around, damnit. I expect tears and wailing and a sense of utter hopelessness – how DARE you manage for yourselves! You’re supposed to NEED me!

Okay, answering my very few emails now. *sniff*

my, what a large peanut you have

Posted in everyday kimli, vroom vroom by

I saw a three-storey tall Mr. Peanut on my way to work today. I know I didn’t get enough sleep last night, but I am pretty sure I was not hallucinating – there, in a field, was an enormous Mr. Peanut. Cane, monocle, top hat – the works. He was large and jolly and completely out of place, even for North Vancouver. If I liked peanuts, I’m sure I would be craving some now – but really, I’m just curious as to why the giant Mr. Peanut was there in the first place and .. um .. if anyone else besides me saw it.

It is way, way too nice out to work. I am staring out the window longingly because it is gorgeous outside and also to avoid staring at the floor, where I saw a spider earlier. I’ve already done a dance of fear and have rolled up my pant legs so nothing can crawl up there and bite me, but I still fear. I bet if I was riding Oscar, nothing could bite me because we are like the WIND.

I’m very glad to see that the Lure of the Scooter has not changed even though I am riding a more “hardcore” bike. Oscar, while saturated in awesome, isn’t as cute and approachable as Sally is so I worried that I would see a decline in the number of people who stop to ask me questions about scooter riding and scooters in general. But no! The nicer the weather, the more people want to know all about it and I am more than glad to wax poetry about the wonders of scooter riding. The questions are generally the same – can you go on highways, how much does it cost, how fast can you go – and my answers haven’t changed: I answer for the 50cc scooter they assume it is. While I technically CAN go on highways, I will not and don’t want potential scooter riders to think they can on a regular bike, so I say no. In fact, the real reason I upgraded to a more powerful scooter was so I can keep up with traffic safely on the Lions Gate Bridge – that’s it. No speed demon here; I am quite content to ride on the side of caution rather than trying to get to that red light three seconds before the person next to me.

Lastly, there are the celebrations:

Happy birthday, Ali! We love you and owe you a visit!
Happy birthday, Lisa! We will hook up and go for a scooter ride soon!
Happy 4th of July, Americans! I like your Mexican restaurants!

clogging up the tubes

Posted in broken kimli, vroom vroom by

Yarr! Thar be OIL in my tubes!

Oscar is leaking oil. I’ve done some research, and I *think* that tipping him on Monday night caused the oil thingie to overflow and spill down into my tubes, which is now leaking out all over the environment and warming the globe and making Al Gore cry. Apparently the tube is where oil burns OFF, not sits and has itself a little party. I posted a message on the Vino 125 boards, and I’m now anxiously refreshing the page to see if anyone has responded to my message. If oil is not supposed to be there, how do I get the oil out? I know NOTHING about cars and oils and the inner workings of my motorized toys. I don’t want Oscar to leak anymore! I don’t want oil in my tubes! AHH!

I do, however, completely covet this cake – this is awesome, even if it made me make a poop joke:

Clamb says: http://www.floatingcat.com/info.php?id=186
Kimli says: OMG !!!
Clamb says: next years cake, eh?
Kimli says: holy shit yes
Clamb says: too bad it doesn’t actually transform.
Kimli says: it does
Kimli says: it transforms into POOP
Clamb says: heh
Clamb says: that’s a one way transformation!  Making it back into truck mode would be ….. awkward

Someone left a label maker on my desk. I am going to go label EVERYTHING.

war wounds

Posted in broken kimli, vroom vroom by

I am really fucking angry with myself.

I had another accident last night. Like my last 17 incidents, it was a stupid freak mishap that resulted in a bloody knee, many more bruises, and worst of all – Oscar’s first dings. I haven’t even had him for a week and he’s already quite obviously MY scooter because he’s banged up in several places. It’s just some scrapes – nothing serious or really all that noticeable unless you’re close up – but I am mad at myself, at the hill I fell on, at Ed, at Oscar, at my bloody bruised knees, and anything else within my sight.

I know it was just a stupid accident and it could have happened to anyone, but it happened to me, again. Halfway up a steep hill I decided to turn around, forgetting that Oscar is at least twice as heavy as Sally, and also taller – and because the hill was really that steep, I misjudged my footing and toppled onto my left, sliding down the hill a little. I scraped up Oscar’s left side, putting gouges into the knee panel, the front fender, and the Vino badge. It’s nothing a little touch-up paint and a new badge won’t fix, and my bruises will eventually go away and my knee will scab up and I’ll look extremely sexy in short skirts – but I am so fucking mad at myself I could scream.

I’m always careful. I don’t ride like a maniac, I don’t take risks, I don’t do outlandish things or try to show off. So why do I keep falling over? Is every freak accident I have just that – a weird mishap that results in down? Why does it keep happening to me? Ed argued that every single one of my accidents were avoidable, to which I scoffed – technically, every accident is avoidable. However, I wasn’t DOING ANYTHING to cause accidents; they just happened – which I suppose is the very definition of “accident”. So, what gives? Am I really that much of a klutz? Is the universe conspiring against me? Are my 84 small accidents saving me from one big accident? Is there any way I can completely avoid wet leaves, slippery concrete, curbs, and hills? Should I just buy a suit made of bubble wrap and call it a day? Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. I am just so mad at me. I fucking suck.

Poor Oscar. Welcome to life with Kimli!

Fuck.

no rest for the wikked \o/

Posted in medical anomaly, vroom vroom by

This weekend is making me tired.

We’re off to Victoria after work tonight, to help my mom move some stuff over to her new place. It’s going to be an exhausting weekend; we’ll arrive late tonight then spend two days moving crap before returning home late Sunday. So much for a restful weekend – good thing there’s a long weekend coming up soon.

There are some new pictures up at Ye Olde Flickr, including shots of Oscar and Sally side by side. Oscar is big. Ed is in love. I am anxious to begin riding for real, so I need to get my permit ASAP. I dream of being able to ride Oscar to the island, and that’ll never happen unless I’m all legal about it so I plan to study the motorcycle textbook this weekend and take the test on Monday. I haven’t had to take a test in years, so I’m kind of nervous. What if I fail?! Oh, the humiliation! Quick, anyone have a cheat sheet?

Fuck, I’m tired. I also think I have arm cancer. Since my accident in April, there’s been a strange spot on my upper left arm that is alternately painful and numb. Odder still is the fact that I dislocated my right arm; why my left hurts is beyond me. I’d just chalk it up to a bruise, but I didn’t fall on that side (my entire left side was pretty much untouched), and the sensation is wholly unusual. I’m going to get it checked out at some point, solely because there’s a birthmark where the pain is coming from. I don’t think I have melanomas – I’m a nerd; I don’t get much sun – but all the things that you’re supposed to check for are there:

  • It’s ever so slightly asymmetrical
  • The border is irregular if I squint at it
  • Colour: well, it’s varying shades of brown?
  • It’s bigger than 5mm – it’s actually 12mm! Ahh!
  • If I stare at it, it changes shape

See? Arm cancers!!

I know this is probably just more of my melodramatic hypochondria, but I’d rather get it checked out than have my arm fall off because I ignored the symptoms. I like my left arm. It has many tattoos on it, and it holds my watch.

Is it 5 yet? I may not be looking forward to going to Victoria, but I’d rather do that than sit at my desk.

 

 

meet oscar

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Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce Oscar the Lady Tickler:

Just .. wow.

Oscar was a she until I sat on him for the first time and powered him up – I immediately realized that this was no delicate lady scooter but a MAN, and one who was trying his damnedest to know me intimately from the inside. I also had no idea Oscar was blue; I thought I was getting a silver scooter but none were available. I don’t mind in the slightest; Oscar is a very pretty blue and I’m going to trick him out with chrome and pieces of awesome.

Oscar rides like a dream. He’s so much bigger than Sally it’s kind of scary – not only can I keep up with traffic even on the Lions Gate Bridge, the stance is much taller. I have to stand on my toes when I get on him! The seat is quite comfy, and all the gauges are big and official-looking. It also amuses me to no end that my speedometer goes to 140km – Sally’s gauge ended at 60, and Oscar just keeps on going. He’s the closest I will ever get to riding a boss hog, and I am slightly awed at the amount of power I now wield betwix my legs.

It’s going to take some getting used to, of course (not to mention a new license – in answer to your question yesterday Donna, SHHHHH – I’m getting my learner’s on Monday). I’m already planning upgrades and mods – I sorely miss having a basket, for one, and there’s no bag hook on the NA models so I’ll have to import a hook from the Japanese model. Luckily, my favourite Scooter mod shop works on Vinos as well as Honda machines (one of the many reasons I did not opt for a Vespa) so I’ll start nosing around next week to see what he can get for me.

Excited. Still not used to seeing Sally when I look out the window, but definitely getting used to Oscar the Lady Tickler.

More pics can be found here!

bye bye sally

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I no longer have a scooter.

Sally is gone – yesterday at 5pm, I handed her keys over to someone else and slowly walked away.

This sucks.

However.

I sold her to Reilly, who promises to take excellent care of her. He is now officially a Jerk with a Camera and a Scooter, which is about a million times cooler.

Also, by the end of the day, I should have a brand new scooter – a Yamaha Vino 125 that boasts 124ccs to Sally’s 49. I will be both fast AND furious, albeit with an enormous grin on my round, garish face.

Everything happened so fast that my head is still spinning. Over beers on Sunday evening I mentioned that eventually I wanted to upgrade my scooter and I’d probably be selling Sally at that time. By Monday, Reilly had test-ridden Sally and had an envelope full of money for me – all that was left was for me to take it, and figure out what I wanted to do with my life (besides the obvious “I wanna rock”).

Back at the Space Station on Tuesday, I made many frantic phone calls. The Yamaha dealership on Hastings was more than happy to help me out (unlike the North Shore Yamaha, who told me a) scooters were dumb, b) I really wanted a motorcycle, c) getting scooters in stock to sell was a pain in the ass and d) they weren’t getting any more scooters at all). I went to the dealership yesterday afternoon, filled out some paperwork, and as long as Toronto gives the thumbs up this morning, they’ll be driving out to Middle of Nowhere BC and bringing back a brand new scooter that does not yet have a name. I am nervous and will be until I get the phone call – then I’ll be nervous until I actually get the scooter – then I’ll be nervous until I’m used to the new ride. Basically, I am a nervous wreck AND I miss Sally.

She does look gorgeous in her new home, though – look!

You served me well, Sally – may you treat your new owner as well as you treated me!

*sniffle*

all wet

Posted in nerd, vroom vroom by

That was a distinctly unpleasant ride.

It had just started to rain when I left the house, but it didn’t look too bad so I bravely pressed on. In retrospect, it would have been an excellent idea to go back inside and a) put on a rain jacket and b) bring a change of pants – I am thoroughly soaked all over. I could practically feel the pity emanating from the cars that passed me on the road because I was a pretty pathetic site – more so than usual, that is.

Today’s craptastic weather effectively cancels our plan of a group scoot tomorrow. I am disappointed, but more that it’s going to be gloomy than anything else. We can scoot anytime this summer, and it will be Good Times. Instead, I think we may be making a trip over the border so we can go to my favourite Mexican restaurant and maybe take advantage of the excellent dollar to buy some electronics because obviously I need more toys.

Speaking of which, I just noticed that I left my DS at home today – NOW what the hell am I going to do at lunch or when I don’t want to answer any more stupid questions?

Today I feel grungy, and not at all in the good way from 1992.

smug but mobile

Posted in i'm an astronaut, vroom vroom by

I am broke.

But I have Sally back!

My scooter has been running really sluggish for a while, so I figured it was time for her annual check-up. I took her to the shop on Tuesday and picked her up this morning, all shiny and clean (on the inside only, since they didn’t have time to wash her) and running like an expensive kitten. The bill was $192+change, but she’s running a lot better and once I get her washed, everything will be just lovely. It has to be, because my birthday is in four days and I demand loveliness.

I may not get it, though. For my birthday weekend, the North Shore Hipster Squad is planning to rent scooters and ride around downtown and Stanley Park all day so Josh, Shan and Ed can have just a small taste of how awesome it is to be me. The weather doesn’t seem to want to cooperate, though – I’ve been keeping a sparkly eye on the forecast all week and it’s just getting more gloomy and wet as the week goes on. We have a backup plan, and I suppose we can rent scooters at any point during the summer, but STILL. It’s my BIRTHDAY (weekend). I want outdoor fun at low speeds! I want everyone to experience the joy of helmet head! I want to terrify the elderly and freak out the squares! I want to experience Japanese Quadrophenia! Oh please won’t you let me LIVE!

Ahem.

There is minor drama at the Space Station. I know, I’m shocked too – it’s usually so stable and logical here. This time though, the drama doesn’t really involve me. It seems that the VP of Space came in this morning at 9, and no one was here. He put little notes on everyone’s keyboards that said “9am” – a small reminder that we open at 9 so you should probably be here at 9 and not 9:15, or 9:50, or 10:20. I am not too concerned about it, since I told everyone yesterday that I was going to be a little late this morning after picking Sally up from the shop. I talked to the VP about it, and all is good. However, two other people who got the note walked in this morning at 9:40 and are now throwing princess fits – I stay LATE and work WEEKENDS and take the BUS and do MORE than anyone ELSE and MOAN and GROAN and oh shut the hell up. I am damn pleased that the “be here at 9am or I will kill you” brush is being applied to EVERYONE and not just me – remember, it was a big part of the Unpleasantness of April and one of the reasons they were going to send me out the airlock – that, plus the whole “unreliable” “naïve” “pushy” “hard to get along with” “too much green eye shadow” “constantly swearing” “dirty aura” “smells funny” crap. So, hah. I feel excellent about it all and not a little smug.

I also finally got a response to my outrageous vacation demands – and they were approved! I can take 5 days off in July, and I’ll be getting paid for them. Whee! Now I can visit the in-laws and help my mom move, without having to choose between paying rent and being a dutiful daughter/in law. I am pleased. Hooray for my pushiness!