When I came out of the office party yesterday, I had a $70 parking ticket on my window. I managed to escape the Wrath of the Meter Maids outside our office, but the nasty beasts at Impark were a little quicker on the draw. It seems that I cannot expense parking tickets, either – I drove HR back to the office after the party. Damn! That’s one less Koala Swimwear for Ed for Christmas. :(
I certainly don’t remember having the time of my life last night, but my neck feels otherwise. I feel like I have some sort of whiplash – perhaps ass whiplash – but whatever it is, it fucking hurts. I can’t turn my head to the right more than 10 degrees or my whole right shoulder assembly freezes up and starts swearing at me in foreign languages. I don’t like it. Thankfully, Hello Kitty dressed up like a panda is doing a lot to cheer me up.
This update is a whole lot of nothing. I’m grievously wounded – cut me some slack. Here, maybe these will amuse you:
Yeah, I don’t know either.
delicious juice dot com 
Heh Kim…good to see you the other evening. What’s with the neck problems? I woke up this morning and have the same problem on the left side. I can barely turn my head and looking up is tough. I slathered on Tiger Balm before I left for work this morning but it’s not quite doing the trick. Maybe a visit to the Chiropractor is in order if this doesn’t get better soon?
Hmm. After some examination, I think I might have the answers.
From top left to bottom right, because I am North American;
No swallowing Rubik’s Cubes, because it will make you cry.
No breaking the diving board, lardbutt.
No strangling yourself; it will also make you cry.
No setting hair on fire; it won’t make you cry, just look sad.
So, how did I do?!