The combination of watching Kick-Ass two nights ago and my impotent rage/desire to bash some heads in has me daydreaming about being a masked vigilante on a masked scooter. I would drive around down looking for dangerous drivers, and take a +4 morning star to their cars. If I can instill raging fear in the hearts of many, maybe stupid horrible inattentive idiotic and just plain BAD drivers wouldn’t do this to my friends:
this woman does not look nearly as upset as i'd like to make her
This dumb cunt made a left hand turn from the far right lane directly into my friend Josh, who couldn’t react in time to stop. He’s okay – some scrapes and a mangled toe – but his bike is in bad shape. Honestly, I want to ride up to this woman and scream at her until she breaks down in sobs and promises never to get behind the wheel of a car again. I want her to feel the terror felt by everyone who loves Josh when they received word that he had been in an accident. I want her to beg for mercy in front of my +4 morning star, then cut to a fantasy scene in which I bash her fucking stupid head in John Woo-style before returning to a reality where I drag her dumb cunt ass to the store so she can buy Josh a new motorcycle. ICBC can handle the insurance; I just want pure Marvel Comics revenge. And my name would be way cooler than “Kick Ass”.
Wake the fuck up behind the wheel, people. That includes you, ridiculous bitch in a minivan on Hastings this morning who tried to change lanes into me and steadfastly ignored me when I laid on the horn and drove by her. I have many angry towards people who don’t pay attention when they’re behind the wheel, and if I get killed by some cockstain while on my scooter, I am going to be the most vengeful poltergeist the world has ever seen.
Stop. Hurting. My. Friends.
delicious juice dot com 
There are days where I feel like a target at a shooting gallery. I’m glad to hear Josh is okay. I was taught that motorcycles are invisible when I did my riding school, but I was horrified to learn first hand that it’s 100% true – even when I’m wearing a hi-viz yellow vest :/
God, you’d think this was Kelowna, not Vancouver.
I don’t cycle in Kelowna because the drivers and the other cyclists (mostly the cyclists) are that stupid as the default.
Sigh. Good thing Josh is okay, but I still say be the vigilante anyways.
Can I be part of your gang? Sounds like an ideal solution to me.
my wish is that it’s MANDATORY for everyone to ride on a bike/motorcycle/scooter for at least a week. then maybe they’ll realize what stupid a** drivers they and most people are when it comes to 2-wheeled vehicles. and pedestrians too.
i would love to get in on this too. got room for one more?
The only thing more terrifying than a furious, weapon-wielding girl on a scooter is a whole GANG of them – we will make other motorcycle gangs look like kittens.
“my wish is that it’s MANDATORY for everyone to ride on a bike/motorcycle/scooter for at least a week. then maybe they’ll realize what stupid a** drivers they and most people are when it comes to 2-wheeled vehicles. and pedestrians too.”
YES!
I will join your gang, and be “The Flashing Badger”err “The Badger Flash”. I am so glad Josh is ok too. Way to nice a guy to be the victim of a bad drive in a Volvo. And that bitch was driving the world’s safest cars unsafely. I have had drivers try to change lanes into me so many times, now I will kick their doors with my boots to get their attention, try it some time it feels good.
P.S. You would rock as a Super Hero just saying