rent-a-kimli

Canada’s traveling sex trade show (which is a trade show about sex and not a show about the sex trade) is in Vancouver next month, and I’ve decided I need to cover it in an “official” sense. Therefore, I’m prostituting my services as a blogger to anyone who wants detailed, thorough coverage of the Taboo Naughty But Nice Show from January 13-16 2011.

Why should you go with me instead of the usual people who cover things in Vancouver?

  • I have 10 years of blogging experience
  • I have 20 years of sex experience
  • I really like to write long, overly detailed entries filled with pop culture references and needlessly graphic hyperbole
  • I am not at all afraid to talk about sex
  • I’ve taken part in two Taboo shows in Calgary; twice as a model and once as a booth monkey
  • I went to Dildo School
  • I really, really like talking about sex
  • I have a unique way of seeing things
  • .. coupled with a unique way of sharing what I’ve seen via my blog
  • I have, like, 7 readers who would learn all about the sex show!
  • One of my 2011 goals is to do more blogging in an official capacity and not just for my own amusement
  • The Vancouver Opera likes my blogging, and if I can blog about opera, I should be able to handle a few cocks
  • .. please, let me handle a few cocks
  • Tee hee, “cocks”
  • Seriously, let me cover the damn show already – people can vouch for me; I’m filthy and hilarious
  • Pretty please?

.. yeah, it’s been a while since I’ve written a resume. I’m serious about this, though – I’d really like to attend the Taboo Sex Show and provide coverage marinated in my own delicious juices. If you or someone you know is looking for an experienced, busty blogger to write all about the titillating things that go on behind the velvet rope, please send them my way or to kimli at delicious juice dot com. I know new experiences can be scary, but if you just relax, go slow and unclench your sphincter, you’ll soon find that things could be totally awesome if only you’d give it a chance (and by “it”, I mean “me”).

I’m professional!

5 thoughts on “rent-a-kimli

  1. Pingback: mmx in review « delicious juice dot com: unapologetically inappropriate

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