how to: lent

I am not a practicing religionite, but I understand today is a Big Day in Western Christiness – it is Lent. Lent is when you give up things because your life is too awesome and that makes Jeeves sad because he is just a butler yet you have so much, so you stop being happy for a while and this makes your butler rise from the grave and feed everyone tuna sandwiches and chocolate eggs. I do not understand religiosity, but I am always respectful of forced suffering in the name of the Holly Father all the way up there in the mistletoe, so here is a list of things you could consider giving up for Lents:

  • Lactose intolerance
  • Tetris
  • Traffic jams
  • Orkut
  • Diaper play
  • Moisturizer
  • Voice mail
  • 17th century prostitution
  • Full-frontal espionage

These are just examples, mind you – there are so many things you could give up for Lant to make Jeeves feel better about his indentured servitude and also your plan to crucify him so he can return from the dead with sandwiches and brightly coloured eggs. Also, it’s Mardi Gras. Show me your tits.

8 thoughts on “how to: lent

  1. I already gave up Jeebus; does that count?
    Also, I’ll show you my tits BUT only if you don’t mock my cleavage as it’s inferior to yours nor do I wish my breasteses appearing on the Webz.
    Those iz my terms, woman. Take or leave. :P

  2. Tetris? How could I possibly give up tetris? It runs great under wine and would be a lot easier to invoke if I could figure out how to construct a proper menu shortcut in KDE4 but that’s ok, I can navigate to it in Dolphin, right-click and “Open with” wine. I’d rather give up canned asparagus or, even better, haggis but hey, I’m not catholic. Never mind.

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