I am very, very bad at sleep.

oh, this isn’t good at *all*

I bought myself a Fitbit several weeks ago because gadget, but I was also curious about my sleeping habits. I knew that I was a restless sleeper who occasionally suffered from insomnia, but I was probably still getting enough sleep because most of the time I feel okay in the morning. I’m just doing this for science (and because I like sleeping with technology strapped to my arm). Let’s learn!

.. and now I’ve learned that I’m REALLY FUCKING BAD at sleeping! In addition to going to sleep times WAY too late, I drink caffeine all day (and night) long and tend to do most of my deep thinking while I’m supposed to be counting sheep. It’s pretty clear now that what I just wrote off as my not being a morning person is really a severe inability to sleep and STAY asleep (unless it’s the middle of the afternoon and I’m taking a 3-hour nap). Something has to change: I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day do right now on my minimal amount of rest (all my best sleep came after I was supposed to be at work, but I dragged my carcass into the office around 11am because I am a trooper). I’m struggling to keep my eyes open, I can’t complete sentences, I feel utterly useless, and everything is confusing. Where am I? Is it my turn to mayonnaise?

Starting this weekend, I am going to try to cut off my caffeine consumption after 7pm, be in bed by 10:30, and turn off all my devices by 11. I NEED to get more sleep. I’m about to become very, very busy at work and I don’t have time to be stupid (I’ll leave that to others).

I am so fucking tired.