coming up milhouse

January is a terrible month for a lot of people, myself included. It’s been a little rough around these parts – Ed has some sort of Mysterious Illness that is like the heartburn equivalent to last year’s Not Asthma, and I’ve been elbow-deep in misery for a variety of Reasons, some even based in reality. However, tomorrow is the start of another month, and I’m looking to get past these winter blahs and into some Epic Adventure.

Things are looking up ’round here, though. Ed is slowly getting better thanks to some timely medication and cutting back on the intravenous drug use, and the things that were hanging over my head have taken a turn for the great, with the best possible outcome. Stuff is getting good again, and even though I don’t own holographic glitter lamé pants (I’m writing this while half-watching the NHL All-Star game), I am pretty excited about what the rest of 2016 may hold.

For the past several months, I’ve been really unhappy at my job. I didn’t have enough to do, and although I continually pestered people for work, there just wasn’t any that could be readily handed off to me. While some people may enjoy being paid to do absolutely nothing, I find it discouraging and exhausting. I like being proud of the work I do, and when there’s nothing .. well, you kind of lose any sort of passion for being awake from 9-5, Monday to Friday. Things came to a head over the last couple of weeks, and I was ready to throw the towel in and look for another job. I even posted as much on Facebook, while taking care to hide the post from people I worked with (or so I thought). As I worked on my resume and looked for things I might want to do outside the nest, I got a little cocky in my despair: I wrote an email to the VP of another team at work, and basically demanded to be put on his team to cover a bunch of things I knew needed doing. The VP talked to the CTO who talked to my boss who talked to the VP, several goats and chickens and a bag of tobacco were exchanged, and as of last Friday I am officially on a different team at work; one with things for me to do. I have to attend meetings! And DO THINGS! This pleases me greatly, because I was so fucking bored and miserable. It was nothing against my boss, he’s great – but it’s a “finding your fit” thing. It took me much longer than usual (and not for lack of trying) to find my fit, but I think we’re there now. I am looking forward to being challenged again, and maaaaaaybe doing a little less online shopping.

I went for coffee with my department’s HR rep last Thursday, and I found out I’m not nearly as clever as I thought I am – the Facebook post I made putting feelers out for another job definitely made it back to management, and apparently it freaked them all out. Certain people were told to FIX IT (meaning my despair), so when I went ahead and proposed a solution that would make me happy, it was agreed to with great speed. This makes me shuffle my feet and go “aww, shucks”, but I’m secretly tickled that people were worried I would leave. Even though I didn’t see any value in the few things I did, others apparently thought differently. That’s nice! I know I undervalue my skills a lot, but it helps a hell of a lot to get some validation that your work IS noticed, even if you feel there isn’t enough of it. That’s already started to change, though, and I’m super glad to have areas to own again. Feeling like I’m contributing and making a difference is crazy important to me, and when you get to do that with good people .. well, it makes for good times.

The last few days have been pretty great, actually. I found my son in Fallout 4, a group of us went to the Shameful Tiki Room to celebrate Renee’s new fancy job last night and we got excellently drunk (after which we successfully hunted down some delicious cake). Today, I was King of Castle Sensible for a mighty reign, I made some delicious popcorn, and John Scott scored twice. We will be debt-free in less than two weeks, we’re going to friggin’ Barcelona in 19 days, and I like my haircut. That’s some good shit, yo. Everything’s coming up Milhouse.