If you’re anything like me, you’re completely awesome. Also, you have an iPhone and use Apple’s Safari in Private Mode as your porn-only browser. This, plus the fact that every single link you open on your phone will open in Safari by default, means you may have hundreds of tabs open. This isn’t really a big deal – the tabs aren’t clogging up your phone tubes or anything – but I like having a clean browser (content browsed notwithstanding). Closing each tab is a pain in the ass, and simply leaving them open is not an option. Sure, you can jailbreak your phone to force the device to accept Chrome as your default browser, but jailbreaking isn’t for everyone. What do you do when you need to close all your Safari tabs in a hurry (say, when the afterglow has worn off and you need to hide the shame of getting off at lustyaccountants.com from even yourself)?
I stumbled upon a neat feature one regret-filled evening not too long ago. If you long-press the tab button in Safari, an option to close all tabs at once appears:
Tap and hold that button to remain in denial about your fetishes. You can even do it with one hand, which is helpful when mistakes are made. Sticky ones. Ones that seemed hot when you read about it on your coworker’s secret Tumblr, but really require a level of expertise you are sorely lacking. Or, you know, whatever.
Go forth, my lovelies, and pound yourselves furiously! You’ve earned it! Just remember to clean up when you’re done, including your browser history!