The Duggar Family of Arkansas just welcomed their 18th child.
This image perfectly sums everything up:
Category Archives: everyday kimli
whole lotta nothing
When I came out of the office party yesterday, I had a $70 parking ticket on my window. I managed to escape the Wrath of the Meter Maids outside our office, but the nasty beasts at Impark were a little quicker on the draw. It seems that I cannot expense parking tickets, either – I drove HR back to the office after the party. Damn! That’s one less Koala Swimwear for Ed for Christmas. :(
I certainly don’t remember having the time of my life last night, but my neck feels otherwise. I feel like I have some sort of whiplash – perhaps ass whiplash – but whatever it is, it fucking hurts. I can’t turn my head to the right more than 10 degrees or my whole right shoulder assembly freezes up and starts swearing at me in foreign languages. I don’t like it. Thankfully, Hello Kitty dressed up like a panda is doing a lot to cheer me up.
This update is a whole lot of nothing. I’m grievously wounded – cut me some slack. Here, maybe these will amuse you:
Yeah, I don’t know either.
jollies
The Cans for Comments have been delivered! I am more excited about getting the pile of food out of my apartment than I am about doing a good thing, but joy is joy and I’ll take it.
Last night I also delivered a large box of makeup and toiletries to the WISH Foundation, so hopefully those will be enjoyed by the ladies there!
I’m really quite jolly, actually. Things are super. Sasha seems to be feeling better. Work is going well (if I get over that whole “chain of command” thing). Things that would normally enrage me are but brief flare-ups of murderous intent before I settle back into my chilly winter calm.
For example, I *could* be upset that my three loonies bought me exactly 36 minutes of parking outside my office this morning and that I’ll probably get a parking ticket before I need to leave at noon – but why bother?
Or I could be angry that last night a man in a large pickup truck saw fit to lay on his horn and swear out his window at me because I didn’t want to put myself into oncoming traffic so he could get his Big Mac 20 seconds sooner – but what’s the point?
And there’s that guy who yelled at me and told me to “read the fucking sign next time” when I accidentally went to the wrong address last night when attempting to drop off the toiletries at WISH – I could be upset that the guy was such a fucking dickface over an innocent mistake, but … naaaah. Merry holidays, you nasty people! I am wishing you good tidings instead of giving you cancer with my mind!
That is my gift to the human race. I am such a prince.
Last night’s Big Meetup was good times. I hadn’t been to Ceili’s in Vancouver before (given that I am a hermit and all – we don’t do the bar scene often), but was pleasantly surprised at the tastiness of my burger. It was very crowded in there so I didn’t get to talk to people for long, but I am fairly confident I fulfilled my social quota for the evening. I even kept things classy, Kimli style, by Twitting about the contents of my bra (my iPhone and my lens cap) for the whole party to see (Twitter was displayed on multiple projectors). I simply ooze decorum and civility. I should probably see a doctor about that.
i spy
I should feel a lot more guilty about this picture than I do, but:
I just think it looks neat, is all.
The Big Giant Meetup at Ceili’s was pretty cool – lots of people. Hello, if I met you there. I was the short round girl in the cape.
I think I’ll go to bed now. I am freezing cold and have another big day ahead of me tomorrow.
the weather outside is frightful
Things that are not a good idea today:
- Driving 80km/h. I realize you may not be familiar with the stuff falling from the sky, but it’s very similar to rain except that it’s frozen and makes things slippery. Most people in this city use all-season tires or never change out of their summer tires, meaning their cars are enormous projectiles on slippery roads. Driving 80km/h – in a 50 zone, no less – is just stupid.
- Driving 20km/h. If you’re that afraid of the snow, stay home or take transit.
- Tailgating. I know I smell good, but your SUV on my rear bumper is making me extremely nervous. If I have to brake suddenly, you are going to ram me in uncomfortable places and I will not be happy about it – and frankly, neither will your insurance rates since you would be 700% at fault.
- Wearing a dress with bare legs
- Wearing a dress with bare legs, then getting into a car with vinyl seats
- Deciding that today was the day you were going to drop off things to the Food Bank and the WISH Foundation no matter what
At least I didn’t try to scoot in today!
The snow is kind of hilarious. I mean, I am not a fan of winter – I hate being wet, cold, and wearing coats – but it’s pretty while it’s falling, and the reactions of people who haven’t lived through real winters are very funny. I’ll be glad when spring rolls around, though.
Tonight I’m going to the Big Vancouver Blogger Meetup. I’m pathologically afraid of new people, but I should at least make an attempt especially since I came in 3rd for Best Personal Blog in Vancouver (for which most of these people were also nominated). Perhaps I should make a sign. Or .. bring a foam hand. Do they make oversized novelty foam hands for third place?
So after whining about my job yesterday I sucked it up and went to talk to my boss. Everything is good, I don’t have anything to worry about, and the only reason the VP hasn’t talked to me directly is because he’s been really busy with other projects I’m not involved in and no worries, my time is coming. It’s all good. I tend to panic very easily when it comes to potential work drama, whether it’s real or imagined. I’ve had such terrible luck with companies in the past that I’m extremely gun shy and paranoid – if someone looks at me funny in the hallway, I immediately think I’m about to be fired and not that they’re looking at me funny because I’m wearing horns in the office again.
Ridiculous weather aside, I am looking forward to being social tonight. How bizarre is that?
zzz
yarrr
shiver me timbers!
cans for comments recap
cans for comment '08
What’s in the picture?
- 12 cans of Campbell’s Vegetable Soup
- 12 cans of Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup
- 5 cans of Spaghetti
- 5 cans of Alphabet pasta
- 2 cans of mixed vegetables
- 2 cans of peas and carrots
- 2 cans of Campbell’s Wild Mushroom Soup
- 2 cans of Campbell’s Chicken Vegetable Soup
- 1 box of Aunt Jemima’s Pancake Mix (the just-add-water kind)
- 1 box of Stove Top Stuffing
- 1 box of Arrowroot cookies
- 1 box of Vanilla Latte granola bars
- 1 box of 12 various instant oatmeals
- 1 box of fancy Rustic crackers
- 1 package of powdered milk
- 1 can of Hunt’s Tomato Sauce
- 1 jar of Classico Sweet Basil Marinara sauce
- 1 can of Primo Spicy Tomato Sauce
- 1 can of meat sauce
- 1 can of cranberry jelly
- 1 can of Tika Massala curry
- 1 can of Cream of Mushroom soup
.. and I know I said you couldn’t pick your can for your comment, but:
- 1 package of Annie’s Organic Shells & Cheese for Anne
- 1 can of green beans for Zola
- 1 can of Pork n’ Beans for Jordan
- 1 can of vegetarian beans for Lisa
- 1 can of something other than beans for Michelle (I hope vegetarian chili is ok)
- 1 can of Campbell’s Cream of Chicken soup for Lawrence
- 1 jar of Cheez Whiz from Ed
- 4 cans of potatoes for Mike
- 2 cans of creamed corn for Matt
- 6 chocolate pudding for Ro
- 6 vanilla pudding for the guy named Semen who commented “dicks in my mouth”
- 20 jars of organic baby food for the angry pro-lifer
“Wait a gosh darned second, here” you’re probably thinking. “That isn’t 169 cans of food, it only adds up to 100! You’re a phony! A big fat phony!”
You’re right.
According to the Vancouver Food Bank website, each dollar donated turns into $3 worth of food thanks to their buying power in the city. With this in mind, Ed and I decided to donate $100 and 69 cans .. except we went overboard, and ended up with $100 and 100 cans.
Thanks again for participating, and from all of us at Delicious Juice Dot Com (which is technically just me but for the sake of spreading the love: me, Ed, Sasha, Cheddar, Hobble, Lemon, The Prince, Domo-kun and the one-handed faceless Amish man), happy holidays n’ stuff!
bronze is the new gold
Have you guys ever seen me speechless?
It’s a hilarious sight.
I honestly don’t know how this happened, but I came in third in the Best of 604 Personal Blog category.
Thank you so, so much. All of you who voted for me – you guys are awesome. I’m beyond flattered and delighted. I won’t lie – there were tears. They didn’t fall, but there was some definite emotion-based moisture in the eyeball region.
Miranda texted me this morning to tell me, and it’s a damn good thing I wasn’t driving because I was shocked and awed. You know when people say things like “I didn’t expect this at all!” and you’re all “okay whatever you totally expected it because you just pulled a pre-written speech out of your pocket so clearly on some level you were prepared in case you won”? Well, I honestly did not expect this in any way shape or form. I’m not very well known in the local blogging scene because I’m pathologically afraid of people and don’t attend many events, so I assumed I would place approximately 40th out of the 36 nominees. Words cannot begin to describe how shocked I was when Miranda texted me the news; not even really big words like circumlocution or grandiloquent.
Truthfully, I gave up on campaigning for myself pretty early on. I figured I didn’t have a choice, given the size of the category, the talent of my fellow nominees, and my relative obscurity. As well, the Cans for Comments drive started the day after voting began, and I focused most of my whoring on getting the word out because I wanted to really make a difference that would benefit others instead of my ego. I think I won the karmic lottery in this round, because not only did I attract a lot of comments for the food bank, I came in 3rd which is basically 2nd, given the controversey surrounding the 1st place winner.
Thanks, everyone.
And congratulations to my fellow nominees and winners – Miranda and Reilly (Blue Olive Photography) came in 3rd in the Best Photo Blog category, Monica (Your Dose of Lunacy) came in 3rd for Best Humour Blog, and Corinna (Gus Greeper) came in 2nd (aka 1st) for Best Personal Blog. These people are so great at what they do, and to be able to say that some people consider me worthy to walk along side them is just .. so very, very cool.
punk rock
I got most of my Christmas shopping done today.
That’s not important, though.
What IS important is that I got new Docs.
Hell yes.
Off to Amanda Palmer 2.0!
Also, the Cans for Comments Extravaganza ends tomorrow at midnight – please leave a comment on any post and for your efforts I will donate one can of food to Vancouver’s Food Bank!
look mummy no hands
Last night’s Amanda Palmer show was fucking amazing.
The best part? I get to do it all again tonight.
The show went until almost 1am – Amanda played for over 2 hours. It was just awesome. She is by far my favourite of all the music people.
I’m getting ready to leave for Seattle (by which I mean I am about 10% ready and 50% packed and do not know where my pants are). I’m seeing the show again tonight with Ali, then spending Friday with her doing girlie stuff. I’m really looking forward to it, not in the least because I get to see Amanda Fucking Palmer again and holy crap she is just awesome.
I somehow managed to take 387 pictures, about 15 of which actually turned out:
It was a great show!
Okay, I really need to track down those pants and get my ass on the road. I have a fairly good idea of the stops I want to make along the way, and the majority of these places would frown upon a fat naked Canadian strolling through the crowds like her dollar isn’t worth only $.77.
delicious juice dot com 