Daily Archives: November 8, 2007

once upon a time, i fell down

Posted in broken kimli by

I have a sneaking suspicion I may have partially dislocated my left shoulder.

For the last little while, my left shoulder has been acting all funny – aching when I sleep funny, twinging most painfully when I stretch, clicking when I swing my arms in a jaunty way, doing this terrifying thing where it feels like it’s going to pop out of the socket and say howdy do – basically, doing all the things I would expect from a previously dislocated shoulder. However, it was my right shoulder that met the ground in such a tragic way last April – while I know I’m sometimes flighty and can’t tell the difference between a cupboard and a closet, it seems pretty unlikely that my body would forget what side is the injured one and make things go hurty in the wrong place. My right shoulder has been doing the same thing, albeit less severely. In fact, it feels almost like I have TWO dislocated shoulders; one more recently displaced than the other – but that doesn’t make any sense, I haven’t fallen off anythin –

Oh, shit.

I DID fall off Oscar a little while ago, and I landed rather spectacularly on my left side. I remember it hurting all over and my knee being a disgusting mess (again), but also that I was more worried that a) I hadn’t ripped my jeans while falling because they were new, and b) I hadn’t damaged my camera, as it was hanging around my neck and hit the ground when I fell. It’s entirely possible that I managed to injure my shoulder during this trip down – I was awfully stiff and sore afterwards, but I just attributed this to having been on a scooter all day and also falling off and landing hard. Could this be why I’m having left shoulder trouble? Does it explain away the extremely alarming incident of a few minutes ago wherein my shoulder started cramping for no reason and it felt like someone jammed a soldering gun into it? So wacky!

I’m really glad there were witnesses to that fall, because it’s really starting to trip me out. For starters, I fell on my LEFT side. I never, ever fall on my left! Perhaps even more alarming than that is this next eerie spine-tingling fact: I didn’t write about the incident at all.

I went through the last 5 months of posts, and I can’t find any reference to the fall. I know it happened – Ed, Josh and Shan were all there – but why on earth didn’t I update about it? I update about EVERYTHING! It’s unfathomable to me that I wouldn’t write about falling down yet again – unless that’s the very reason why I didn’t. Was I embarrassed to have fallen again? I probably should be by now, but it seems highly out of character for me not to have verbally chastised myself for the whole internet to see. Did other epic things happen that weekend that would have made the fall not newsworthy? It’s possible, except I don’t recall what else we did that weekend and if I can’t find it in my archives, then it obviously didn’t happen. I am so confused. Also, true to my nature, I am more worried about the fact that I can’t find any sort of record of my fall rather than be worried about these weird electric-shock type of shoulder jolts I’m experiencing.

Weeeeird.

Edit: AHA! I FOUND IT! I remembered that we scooted *everywhere* that day, including to Iona Beach and did some plane-watching. I looked up the dates on the pictures I posted to Flickr, then went to the corresponding entries for that time period and I found this:

We went for a marathon scoot yesterday; out for about ten hours so today is a good day to clean and recover (yes, I fell down yesterday – shut up).

So I DID write about it, in passing. I feel so much better now – you wouldn’t believe how much this was bothering me.

As you were, then.

we got to pray just to make it today

Posted in everyday kimli by

While my family stopped going to church when I was 8 or so, I used to say a nightly prayer in my head as I was falling asleep. It was a little refrain that used to run through my head almost automatically – it’d start with the usual “dear god”, ask for blessings for my peeps; then get into whatever I was asking for that particular week, such as passing a test or waking up skinny or that my mom would shut up and leave me alone. All good stuff, very normal, look what a pious child I was.

For some reason, the whole string of prayer came back to me as I was drifting off to sleep last night, complete with the appropriate cadence and lilts. It was exactly the same each and every night, so there was a definite flow to it and each person getting a bless request had their own place in the chorus. The whole thing was a nightly habit; it wasn’t until I was 18 or so that I was able to actually fall asleep without the whole thing looping faster and faster in my head like some kind of hyperactive incantation.

So, last night as I remembered this chant that would haunt my sleepiest thoughts, it dawned on me that most normal people ask for blessings for their parents, their pets, their friends and themselves. I did that too. Normal people, however, usually DON’T ask for blessings for cartoon characters as though they were real people. After blessing my parents (because I thought you HAD to, regardless of how crappy they were) and my entire line of pets, I would ask for blessings for Optimus Prime, and Batman & Robin. Nightly. It was the middle of the refrain, and skipping them would be bad luck. It had to be done! They need blessings too!

Part of me thinks it’s cute. The rest of me, however, wonders just how I managed to grow up, forge relationships, not be addicted to any sort of mind-altering substances, and hold down a real job that doesn’t involve pixie dust or carrying a wand.

.. then I remember who I really am, and it all kind of makes sense after all.

PS: I painted daisies on my face in sparkle glitter last night, and it was awesome.