This is me yesterday afternoon at 4:

hairbrushes are for the weak

I’m not normally that pink, but you get the idea.

This is me at 10am this morning:

hair: i haz less of it

I cut off most of my hair yesterday because I was bored. Well, *I* didn’t cut it – Michelle at East Vanity Parlour did. But I told her to! So that counts, right?

Everything is better with USB:

USB 2.0 and 0 calories

This is just awkward, though:

it's so clunky now

I admit it – my boobs are cybernetic:

i charge them nightly otherwise i have no cleavage

Gotta go – lunch time.

this explains why my muffin was $24.99