i quit the internet

It took almost 20 years, but I’ve finally seen something so terrible online that I’m throwing in my jizz rag and quitting the internet:

JESUS CHRIST WHY WOULD YOU EVER SAY THAT TO SOMEONE YOU ENORMOUS CREEPY ASSWAD

You’ll have to pretend that there’s an Instagram picture in there, a self portrait of some girl’s thong-clad ass. Apparently camwhores are up with the times and no longer lurk on Geocities or Penis Chat Roulette, but instead use current photo sharing tools to take self-serving pictures at deceptively flattering MySpace angles so random-ass creepers will fawn over them. Of course, there’s fawning and then there’s .. that. It made me do a full body shudder. I can’t think of a single thing you could possibly say that would be less erotic when faced with someone’s ass and/or labia. I quit the goddamn internet*. Happy now? You win.

*: until tomorrow :P

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