twang

I’ve been trying to take better care of my unmentionables – mithril ain’t cheap – but yesterday I must have been doing some sort of crazy ninja moves, because I somehow broke not one but TWO underwires in my bra. I spent much of the morning digging for treasure in my right chest before I gave up and went to inspect the damage (barely remembering to leave the room to do so) – a jagged underwire, a bloody gouge, and a lot of swearing. ย I resigned myself to an afternoon of lopsided cleavage, but a loud metallic “TWANG!” sounded from my left chest shortly after: unable to bear the load meant to be shared across two, my left underwire went down for the count and snapped in half. Sure, it solved my worries about being lopsided, but now I was a danger to myself and others; much more so than usual. Between the limping and my lethally untethered lady melons, Thursday was just not a good day. I was glad when it was over.

My foot was on the fast track to getting better, but on Wednesday after work I forgot that I was broken all over and I .. jumped off the bus. No, I don’t know why I did it. Yes, it was a monumentally stupid thing to do. By the time I hobbled home, I was in so much pain that I was in tears – I couldn’t put ANY weight on the foot at all, and there was swelling where there ought not be any swelling. Ed dug my hated air cast out of the closet and I tried it on, but if anything it made things worse and I couldn’t get it off fast enough. I didn’t want to go back to the ER – among other reasons, it was Pork Night and dinner was in the oven – so I spent the evening alternately hopping around on one leg, crawling, and demanding Ed fetch things for me in a lofty manner (the demanding, not the fetching).

There just might be something to this whole “just keep off it” thing after all, because after a night of sleep my foot was a lot better. I was still limping, but I could actually put it down on the ground without crying out; a marked improvement from the night before. It still hurts, but maybe if I stop trying to DO lol sports instead of just writing about them, I might actually heal and stuff. That’d be super!

So hey, have you voted for me yet? That would also be super.

I have a headache, spring has passed Vancouver over, and May 4th is rapidly shaping up to be a day where cool people leave the planet far too soon. Celebrate your life, people. Live it like it’s the most amazing thing you’ll ever do.

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