Monthly Archives: May 2014

who wants to play video games?

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In between quitting jobs, offending excellencies with my sheer awesomeness, all the angst, and cutting off half my hair, I’ve been playing a lot of iPhone games. So out of character, right? Anyway, these games are a blast and you should check them out if you like fun. If you don’t like fun, you’re probably DW and just the worst person I’ve ever met. Just sayin’.

RA

Ruzzle Adventure

Universal
Genre: Word Games
Price: Free

I never played the original Ruzzle game because I am all about playing with myself, not others – but Ruzzle Adventure caught my eye. The price was right, so I downloaded it and waded through the first few rounds. I’m glad I did, because the tutorial levels are deceptively simple .. but once you get to level 20 or so, the game gets HARD. Like, repeatedly failing levels and having to start over hard. I’m a big fan of word games, but I’ve played so many of them that the mechanics of every game comes way too easily, but Ruzzle Adventure is the first word game I’ve encountered in a LONG time that makes me swear. It’s great. Get it now.

DD

Dwarven Den – The Mining Puzzle Game

Universal
Genre: Puzzle/Adventure
Price: Free

Another title grabbed on a whim that quickly turned into a favourite, Dwarven Den is a lot of fun. You have a different goal each level, ranging from mining gold to forge new tools to locating your fellow dwarves after some sort of attack. In each level you have a limited amount of energy and “tech”, which is kind of like dwarf mana – but if either of those run out, you’re screwed. You also get a variety of tools to use that will help you access areas or capture monsters. For a free game, there are surprising number of levels – I’m at level 69, with another 20 to go. Each level has tons of replay value, and there are a lot of different pieces of equipment to find or create via the forge. I don’t think I’ve encountered a game quite like this before, but I’m really loving it – definitely a favourite by now.

SMBB


Super Monkey Ball Bounce – Canadian iTunes Only

Universal
Genre: Peggle, with Monkeys
Price: Free

This title was soft-launched in Canada, and isn’t in the US store yet. If you absolutely must get your hands on this Peggle-knockoff, you either need to be Canadian or have a Canadian iTunes account. It’s pretty good if you don’t want to do any exact trick shots (the fine tune controls are not great), and the addition of the saccharine-cuteness of the monkeys is appealing .. if you’re a fan of SEGA’s Monkey Ball games, then you’ll like this. It’s no Peggle, but it’ll do until Peggle 2 is launched on iOS (which, Popcap, GET ON WITH IT ALREADY).

 

the excellencies

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Late last week, we got an email at work advising us to dress appropriately and be on our best behaviour today, because the Excellencies were coming.

I don’t know how this was arranged, but the Ambassadors of Uganda, Libya, and Moldova were coming to tour our offices to see Canadian technology in action. We were asked to clean our workstations, be immaculate, and use formal greetings when addressing the assorted Excellencies:

  • His Excellency, Dr. Fathi Mohamed Baja, Ambassador of Libya
  • Her Excellency, Ala Beleavschi, Ambassador of Moldova
  • His Excellency, John Nsambu, High Commissioner of Uganda

The Ambassadors, we were told, were the official representatives of their President/King/Prime Minister, and that they appreciate being treated with honour and respect. Well, okay then!

.. I worked from home today. I don’t do toadying, and I have a big, big problem with Uganda’s despicable anti-gay policy and the lack of basic human rights in Libya and Moldova. Since I couldn’t promise that I wouldn’t make a scene or fondle Sam in front of the assorted Excellencies and their entourage (not to mention my inability/unwillingness to “dress appropriately”, whatever that means), I decided it would be best for all involved if I just removed myself from temptation. So, I’m at home. I’m getting a ton of stuff done, and I’m not wearing any pants.

It is a good day in the Lady Cave.

dj diana in the house

all good things ..

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Yesterday marked the climax of an incredibly difficult two weeks: I quit my job. My last day will be on June 6th.

The decision to leave was a very long time in the making, because I truly loved my job. Unfortunately, a series of Unfortunate Circumstances made it impossible for me to keep calm-ish and carry on, as I’d been doing with marginal success since last July .. so I had to make the call. And it sucks.

For a very long time, I really loved my job. It was challenging and fun and I was learning more about mobile development than I ever thought possible. I found a talent for requirements that I didn’t know I had, and I was genuinely excited to ferret out all the tiny details that go into making something work. I loved my coworkers. I loved my projects. I didn’t love my desk, but even that source of daily annoyance was but a tiny fluffy cloud in the overall blue skies of my life.

After more than a year of giddiness about my job, things went south. I won’t go into detail here – you know where to find me if you want to hear the long, boring saga – but I kept thinking that maybe it would get better, and maybe things weren’t so bad, and maybe I really DID do terrible work and every other person I’ve worked with in my entire life was lying to me about my skills, and maybe no one else WOULD ever hire me, and maybe there ISN’T any value in my work, and maybe I was an awful person who deserved everything that happened, and blah blah blah Stockholm Syndrome.

Just when I learning to cope with the panic attacks, insomnia, and stress-related pointy zebra raves, the craziest thing happened: out of nowhere a massive straw fell from the sky and landed directly on a poor camel, snapping his spine into a zillion pieces! zomg!

The massive camel-seeking straw was the last of its kind, and on Friday I submitted my resignation.

I’m pretty torn up about it, because I still believe in the talents of my team and the work we were doing. I know they’ll soldier on just fine without me (hopefully not TOO fine), and my leaving isn’t that big a deal. Still, I felt so bad about abandoning them that I brought in Apology Cake as I broke the news .. I’m really going to miss them. I made a lot of friends at this job, some of whom are still there, and I’ll miss them terribly. For the longest time, I thought I could stick it out because I got to work with such awesome people, but in the end, it was a really big straw. And not a single person can blame me for doing what I have to do.

It’s not all bad, though: I start my new job on July 7th!

I have a crazy cool opportunity ahead of me, and I’m really excited about it. My confidence is a little shaky right now, but I know I can rock this shit like no other. Plus, I have three+ weeks in London between jobs which’ll go a long way in fixing my head space. Everything is coming up Milhouse – I’m looking forward to a new challenge (and also London because YAY LONDON!).

I’m sad right now, though. It’s hard not to remember how fucking amazing my job was, and think about all the cool people I’m leaving behind.

.. it was a really, really big straw.

delicious but sad

three cheers for anal

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Being anal retentive is awesome!

While preparing for my very own storage locker, I packed up some boxes and made meticulous notes on the contents of each one. It reminded me a lot of our move to BC back in 2004, when I had a huge notebook filled with page after page of lists (when you start packing for a move 6 months early, you get really good at boxes). Thankfully we’re now in the future and paper notebooks are a quaint anachronism collecting dust on my shelves, so my lists are in Evernote .. but the idea is the same: lists. Documentation. A system, complete with requirement numbering. What can I say? Tech writers gonna tech write.

Anyway, tonight I needed something obscure from my storage locker. Thanks to my notes, I was able to go immediately to the box I needed and pull out my prize. The prize is pretty lousy – three picture frames and a plate stand – but what I grabbed isn’t the point here, it’s that I have lists and notes and I am super anal retentive for one so utterly chaotic, and it fucking rules.

Three cheers for (being) anal (retentive)!

ominous!

ominous!

pointy zebra rave

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I think I may be cursed.

Yesterday afternoon, I think I had a stroke. At the very least, I had something that felt enough like what I imagine a stroke would feel like that I was terrified and tweeting out my last will and testament just in case – it was really bad. In the back of my mind I knew I probably wasn’t having a stroke, but my second Google-fueled diagnosis was pretty scary too: a detached retina. No big, right? Except OH GOD WHAT

Just before 3pm, I was applying makeup in my bathroom. I had an appointment at 4, one that I needed to be more or less presentable for – and nothing says “I’m awesome” like raccoon eyeliner. It was business as usual, but something felt a little weird in my left eye. I blinked (blunk?) through the tickle, but soon realized that there were a lot of bright flashing lights all around me. Given that I hadn’t accidentally walked into a room of paparazzi with low standards, and I wasn’t in the middle of a rave, I was a little worried. As the lights grew brighter and more distracting, I started to feel nauseous and dizzy and more than a little scared – I’d never experienced anything like this before. The flashing lights were the worst part, because I couldn’t escape them: bright yellow/black/white zigzag stripes bracketing my left eye, seen in my peripheral vision when my eyes were opened or closed. I felt like I was going to pass out or throw up (or do both in one spectacular splash), and it sucked. A lot. Even more so because of that appointment at 4 that I needed to get to. I couldn’t scoot or drive or teleport, the lights weren’t going away, and I was in a right bloody panic about it all – the only saving grace was Ed’s willingness to drive me to my appointment, lights and all. Ed is awesome.

Eventually, the lights faded out of my eyes and then disappeared entirely, only to be replaced with a massive headache. When I was able to actually use my brain again, I discovered that I very likely just experienced my very first ever Ocular Migraine – not a stroke, and probably not a torn retina. I’ve never felt anything like that, and I’m not in any great hurry to try it again. If I had to leave a review of the ocular migraine, it would receive my lowest score ever: seven thumbs up (by which I mean F————–, would not buy again).

I managed to get to my 4pm appointment, but the less said about that, the better. It .. did not go well. It’s exceedingly difficult to make a presentation when you think you’re about to keel over and die from stroking.

Cursed, I tells ya.

this is what cursed looks like

this is what cursed looks like. for hours.