Category Archives: everyday kimli

still waiting for that cupcake

Posted in everyday kimli, nerd by

Like a bolt from the blue, my SqueePC seems to have emerged from the FedEx void – according to the internet, it’s sitting in Richmond awaiting delivery. This is good. I would like my tiny laptop back please.

I was looking at funky cool laptop sleeves yesterday, but all my machines are a) too old, b) too small, c) too small, and d) too big for the selection I found. It’s not really a big deal, but they were fun and I am all about the fun if it comes in neoprene form.

The last of my bridesmaids has given birth – Christy had a daughter sometime in the last week. That’s three for three, all with daughters with cool names – River, Murrin, and Hazel. I am still content with my position of Captain of Team No Babies, but I am happy for my baby-crazed friends. Way to procreate, girls! You rock that placenta!

Is it a bad thing when a video game makes you want to eat ramen?

weekend in a taco

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It’s really been quite the weekend around these parts – there was rampant flirting! Accidental tabloids! Walking pigs! Near accidents! Hard-to-find video game conquests! Delightful new setups! Group noodity! Ninja rulers! BANANAS! I’m almost glad to go back to work tomorrow just so I can have a bit of a breather.

In amongst all the outside social activities, I’ve been busy working to get Banjo properly situated in my corner of the living room. I think I’ve about got it:

Yes, I realize the danger I’m in if an earthquake hits, but that’s part of the excitement of being me.

Tonight during the thrill-a-minute whirlwind laundry/groceries adventure, Ed and I were horrified to discover a People magazine in amongst our organic granola and scent-free laundry detergent. Neither of us particularly CARE about Jodi Sweetin’s meth-baby, so imagine our surprise when she appeared in our stuff. Somehow the magazine leapt off the rack and onto the belt

, and neither of us saw it being rung in. It’ll be a cold day on the sun when I pay $5 for a) shit “news” about celebrities, and b) shit “news” about celebrities I can read on the internets for free. We returned it. And now I have lunch money for tomorrow!

On Saturday night, the gang minus Reilly went to The Rugby Beach Grille on Broadway to celebrate Tanya and Corinna’s joint birthday dinner. It was a lot of fun – tasty (if impossibly slow) food, excellent people, and flirting. Ed spent most of the evening flirting with Gillian! It was so cute. Gillian’s adorable and if I had any flirting skills I would have been doing the same, but it was highly amusing to watch my husband get his 4th-grade-boy groove on.

A new store opened up in North Vancouver called NOOD, and it is completely awesome. Ed and I dropped in on Saturday after finding him some cool new frames (wood! paneling!), and we quickly found ourselves knee-deep in fancy bamboo towels of softy goodness. There’s a lot of really neat houseware-type-things in there, and after singing the praises of the funky new store the rest of gang decided to check it out after brunch today. Now we all have fancy towels. It is good to be dry. Oh, and store club members are called “noodists”. It’s funny because I’m always naked!

And now it’s time to put away the laundry! Hooray!

I am easily excited.

that thing i do

Posted in adventure, everyday kimli by

I have a brutal migraine that is not going away through conventional methods, so I am trying to *think* the fucker away.

Ed asked me last night why I plan things.

Honestly, I’m not quite sure.

We were talking about birthdays and events, and I was thinking out loud about what needed to be done to make the next Big Outing work for everyone involved. Halfway through my stream of thought, Ed asked me why I do it and I didn’t really have a good answer.

Part of it is because I’m afraid no one else will. Everyone I know gets so frustrated when the majority of the day is spent sitting around saying “what do you want to do?” “I dunno, what do YOU want to do?” that it’s just easier if a game plan is laid out beforehand. It’s also because with groups larger than 2 or 3, there are things to consider that may be overlooked – but since I’m so anal about details, I try to cover it. Yes, the planning is a little fun – but most of the time it’s a huge hassle, since people don’t necessarily appreciate the fact that I try to arrange stuff so there are no potentially disastrous situations.

I also tend to worry a lot. A big part of why I don’t enjoy 4×4’ing is because of the unknown – while I am almost always up for Adventure, something about driving off where you shouldn’t and without cell service or a non-homicidal human around for miles makes my inner anal spasm. What if we fall in a ditch? What if we drive into an 8’ deep puddle of crocodiles and can’t get out? What if our entire group goes missing and no one notices we’re gone for 2 weeks and we have to resort to cannibalism? As the juiciest, I’m sure to get eaten first – and did anyone bring napkins and ketchup? I truly do love Adventures, but I am just not that crazy about the Unknown outside of my comfort zone (which, to be fair, is a very large zone).

Also, I *hate* getting dirty.

When it comes to planning Events – birthdays, holidays, Big Fun Things – those I do out of love. I love my peoples, even if they drive me crazy sometimes (and vice versa – I am not much fun to be around when I am in a terrible mood). I plan things that would be fun for everyone because I love my friends and I want people to have good times. I worry about people’s birthdays – even and especially if they don’t – because I want them to know they’re loved and appreciated (and because everyone should feel special on their birthday).

That’s probably the answer right there: I do what I do because I am an anal retentive control freak with an eye for details, a wicked memory, and big squishy love for those I care about.

Awww.

My head still hurts.

field of dongs

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I am being cockblocked, and I do not like it one bit.

I can’t really say much more about it, so I’ll just leave it at that: there are cocks, they are in my way, and it’s making me grumpy.

Bah.

where’s your messiah now

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From a work email:

Canadian Christian College University exceeded the number of daily allowable email sent with 3674 emails on May 30, 2008.

Those wily Christians and their excessive email!

I’m working from home today, and are therefore more busy than if I were in the office.

Also, I’m no longer getting a custom plate for Oscar because it costs the exact same as the repair for my SqueePC. When all is said and done, I’d much rather than portable computing power than yet another way to make my scooter more obviously mine.

It is June, so it is officially my birthday.

get yer pitchfork, ma

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Four people somewhere are missing their right feet, but nobody really cares because

SOMEONE TRIED TO SELL A BABY ON CRAIGSLIST!!!!!111ONEone

Watch me generate ire with the following sentence:

What’s the big fucking deal?

People are shocked and horrified and scandalized and scarred for life that a local couple attempted to sell their newborn baby on Craigslist in Vancouver.

To hear local busybodies and law enforcement speak of it, you would think that no one has ever, in the history of mankind, committed a more heinous act than attempting to see a child via the internet on Craigslist.

I do not understand the violent reactions.

Okay, they probably shouldn’t have put the baby up for sale. But let’s take a look at the situation:

  • The parents are drug addicts
  • They can’t afford or even want the child, and said as much
  • To me, it sounds as though they are not very intelligent people
  • The media is filled with reports of rich famous people adopting children from all over – even adopting kids who already have parents, just not wealthy ones

Put yourself in their shoes. You’re young, dumb, addicted to drugs, and stuck with a baby that was not planned for and that you cannot afford to bring up with any sort of normalcy.

What do you do?

  • They could have aborted it
  • They could have tossed it in a dumpster when it was born

Or

  • They could have researched adoption methods
  • They could have left it on a doorstep somewhere (and probably be tracked down and vilified anyway)

Or

  • They could have tried to get in contact with a black market adoption scheme
  • They could have attempted a private sale

I just don’t understand the horror. Okay, selling a baby isn’t a good idea. We’ve established that. If you’re a drug addict, do you think clearly? You’re a drug addict with a newborn child, and you’re at the end of your frayed rope. There’s desperation. There’s a lack of sleep. Maybe there’s withdrawal. What would you do?

I’d probably come to the same conclusion: let’s sell it. People want babies, right? Rich famous people everywhere are adopting kids from all over! Maybe they’ll take ours!

There could be a healthy sense of humour: I’m stressed out and having a baby sucks. Let’s put it on Craigslist! It’ll be hilarious!

Read some of the comments people are posting on the news article, and tell me if you’re not almost as disgusted with the reactions are you are the whole scenario.

It’s terrible that junkies are allowed to have a baby! Can you imagine how you’d feel if your parents did that to you! (I’d probably be relieved – the junkies gave me a potentially better life) Stupid people should be castrated! What is the world coming to! DRUGS! Everyone is on DRUGS! We should KILL ALL THE DRUG USERS! Won’t someone THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!

What would you rather this pair of dimwitted asshats with an internet connection have done?

Is there truly no alternative than to force unfit, unwilling parents to raise a child? Who’s worse off: the child raised by drug addicts, or the child given away?

Everyone is flipping the fuck out and wanting to lynch these people.

I think they were just really, really dumb.

I dunno.

I wonder how much time or money the screamers who are so Worried About the Children have donated to the earthquake/cyclone aid effort.

one of them

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I’m that person.

The person in line ahead of you in Starbucks.

The one ordering the drink so complicated the barista has to repeat it twice.

I’m the chubby round girl ordering not one but two snacks (in separate bags please) and then having the nerve to order her drink non-fat, like it’ll actually make a difference (disclaimer: one snack is breakfast; the other is for later when I’m about to pass out from hunger but can’t leave the lab because I have back-to-back meetings from 11 until 5) (also, I just plain don’t do whole milk).

Yep, I’m the iced-venti-5-pump-non-fat-easy-ice-tazo-chai-latte.

Sorry ’bout that.

Thanks for that dirty look, though. It made me feel super.

awash with cute

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I had to stop in at the vet yesterday to pick up some cat food for the monsters. While I was waiting, a tech came out with a cat carrier and set it on a chair. Inside the carrier was the tiniest, cutest little light gray kitten – it poked its nose through the bars and looks around and generally was just so adorable I was beside myself with girlish glee.

And just when I was about to pee myself from the cute, an even SMALLER tabby kitten poked its head out from behind the gray kitten. I almost died. It was SO CUTE, and now I want 15 kittens so I can pile them atop me and explode with tiny fuzzy kitty love.

Squeeeee!

The meeting with the Lab CEO that I was so afraid of yesterday went swimmingly, so much so that I got a visit after it was all said and done and was praised up and down and sideways. This is cool. I like praise. Of course, now I have a whole lot more work to do, but that’s okay. If it all gets to be too much, I will smuggle in some kittens.

I am thinking about getting personalized license plates for Oscar.